
How to Escalate or De-escalate from a kiss
When courting women, they would be more likely to politely decline and forgive you for making an advance, than if you never tried. Escalating from being “sweet on one another” to kissing to sex is not a result of an individual trick or process, but rather the bigger picture. If there is a foundation between two people, sex can happen. There is no legally and morally correct way to make a girl have sex with you when she doesn’t want to. However, there are a few moves to help you build up your confidence in taking it to the next level.
Be Receptive.
Gauge her reactions, start small and test the waters. A kiss, feeling her body, a small nibble, tracing her skin, positioning her legs for sex, slight grinding, placing her hand on your member. As you go through the steps and escalate closer to sex stop thinking so much about what you’re doing and start feeling. Sense if she is into it, is she returning the actions? Is she open to more? Is her breathing getting heavier? If she is responding you can begin being more assertive.
There Is No Roadmap.
There is no map that can lead you to the ultimate treasure. There is only one rule. Pay attention. Read the signs when you’re kissing and match her intensity, only escalating it when the moment feels right. However, don’t be deluded into searching for a “signal.” There is no clear green light, as it changes from person to person. If you’re waiting for a certain signal you might miss your chance altogether. Act, be open and ready to de-escalate back down if she isn’t ready.
No Shame In Being Horny.
There is no shame in wanting more. Exercise common sense. Flirting and escalating are completely different from sexual harassment. Be understanding if you have to halt. Don’t overthink it, it’s not the end. It might be too far or too soon. If the moment isn't right, apologise and let her know you read the situation wrong. The most important thing is to build trust, the foundation for any relationship.
Whatever the outcome, be open and ready to communicate. Remember that the first time is often funny or awkward at times, as your figuring out each other's bodies.
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Lexi, XX