CHEATING BY PHONE, IS IT REALLY CHEATING?

     I wonder what everyone really thinks about this subject, I suppose the question should really be “what do you classify as cheating”….. It must be strange to hear a former sex worker say that they do believe phone conversations are a form of cheating, worse than a one-night stand in fact. So let me explain myself as it sounds a bit confusing, how can a woman who slept with men for a living whilst married, think that a phone relationship is a cheating offence?

     The reality is that we are all sexual beings, as humans we need sex in our lives whether for reproducing or for pleasure. So sex for me is just sex, nothing more nothing less. The way I see it is it’s entirely plausible to sleep with another person while you’re in a relationship when based purely on the pleasure factor. We are completely capable of enjoying another body without emotional attachment, especially when we’re already emotionally invested in our partners. On that basis, for me cheating or sex on the side isn’t cheating, even if you don’t have the luxury of being in an open relationship. Cheating or having an affair, is developing an emotional response to another person outside of your relationship, and that is where it gets complicated.

     Everyone can have a one-night stand, get their rocks off and still come home to the loving arms of their partner. Now your guilt complex is another matter, that’s up to you to decompartmentalise but at the end of the day you’ve achieved sexual pleasure and it’s left at that, put right behind you as you look forward. So having sex with someone other than your partner is completely different to falling for someone’s mind and personality, and that’s exactly what can happen when cheating by phone. When talking to someone you lust after via the phone but not actually having sex with them, you can form a much stronger attachment to them by not having the tangible action of sex to fall back on. Getting to know someone’s mind and personality is a much stronger pull than pure lust. You form an illusion of what it can be to love this other person, to have a life with them and when those illusions are imbedded in psyche, it doesn’t take much longer for them to reach your heart. Once that’s happened, it’s a downward spiral to a full-fledged affair.

     Having a quick sexual fling or paying for sex is something you can easily walk away from, you orgasm and that’s it, that’s all you needed. But having a relationship with someone over the phone is something much more mobile, it’s something you bring home with you, it’s virtually cheating right in front of your partner, sneaking phone calls and texts every chance you get. So that’s why I class getting to know someone by phone as cheating and for me so much worse than sex. You can try to explain away getting your rocks off to your partner, it’s easier to say it was a purely carnal impulse, but it’s harder to explain how you fell in love with someone behind your loved ones back. That, is something your partner won’t understand.

     So you see that’s why I personally find phone cheating to be worse than a sexual affair. The consequences are just not worth it, you can mask the act of sex but you can’t mask your emotions, they show through with every expression.

 

Think before you make that phone call….

 

Love Lexi XXX