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* PENIS AFTERCARE INSTRUCTION MANUAL *

  • Never wash your new penis in cold water, the ramifications can be one of extreme shrinkage. You’re penis may be embarrassed if this occurs.
  • Brand new penises can be shy in their new surroundings. They may need a bit of coaxing from their owners to come out of their shell. Give them their own space but always let them know you’re there for them.
  • Sometimes after a hard days work your penis may come home a little stressed.  Ask him how his day was, let him know you care & give him a shoulder to lean on. Maybe even offer him a nice relaxing massage, he will surely appreciate this & may reward you with one in return.
  • Being of the male gender, he will most likely need some occasional ego stroking. You are guaranteed a favourable reaction by telling him that he’s big & muscular. Always remark on his good looks as well, that should gain lots of confidence & trust in you as his new owner.
  • Your new appendage will have a fondness for fun & games. Variety is the way to his heart. Dress him in funny outfits & watch him grow with delight, then play games such as hide & seek. He’s always up for a bit of hide the sausage too. Yes, fun games are definitely the way to your penises heart. Just be aware of the fact that he does get quite tired after all the activity & will require lots of rest afterwards. 
  • Give your penis a warm place to rest his head at night, lots of good night kisses usually ensures a good night sleep. Mornings can be a little difficult for your penis as he usually wakes up stiff & will need to be taken to the bathroom. You can hold his hand through this process as his precision will be off at this time & can create a mess. 
  • A well rounded diet will ensure your penis is nice & healthy. If you want his breath smelling nice, a good tip is to feed him fruits such as pineapple & watermelon, especially if he ever happens to spit in your mouth when over excited. 
  • It is important to take your penis to the doctors for regular health checks, they can fall ill.
  • Frequent use of your penis will incur some wear & tear, but if cared for correctly he should live out a full & happy life. Some penises will eventually require medication as he gets older. Don’t worry too much about this as it is quite normal for them to need a bit of help moving around as they age.

 

by Lexi XX