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The Correct Way to Send a Dick Pic

First some general rules:

     It's best to be 60-75% erect. A flaccid penis looks sad, while a fully erect building penis may be too intense for the first dick pic. You want to leave some room for the imagination, yet still look hard and ready to go.
     As a general rule it's best to touch it, and usually not have a focus shot of just the penis. Women wanna see some stomach, legs or even a full nude. No one wants a lonely penis staring you in the face.
Wish You Were Here:
     For when you're just getting out of the shower or into or out of bed. When you’re feeling someone, even if it’s yourself, and you want to let them know they could be feeling this too.
     How to do: Cover penis either entirely leaving the shape exposed under the blanket, or partially showing off your best assets with a blanket or towel and take the picture from above.
The Full Monty:
     Channel your inner Greece, and pose like a sculpted sexy statue. Women not only appreciate penis but adore the rest of the body, throw it all together with a nice casual yet complementary pose and you’ve got a winner.
     How to do: Find your best angles, make sure you don’t look too posed, show off your best assets. Always make sure the floor is clean!
The Shadow:
     For when you want to seem romantic or artistic. This one is sure to get her in the mood and maybe even say to her friends “I was sent a really creative dick pic the other day.”
     How to do: Using shadows position yourself so you can cast the shadow of your penis onto a wall. You can work your angles to make it look larger than life. Make sure the area in the picture is clean. 
Dick in a box:
     Inspired by Justin Timberlake and Lonely Island’s class song “Dick in a Box”. This one is very simple but requires props. Get yourself a box, a vegetable, anything you can cut a hole into and hide your penis in.
     How to do: measure the size of your penis and cut out a hole big enough to fit it in. Shove your penis into the box or item (with or without balls) and then close it up so that it looks normal. Start recording and open up her surprise!
Mr Squiggle:
     Bringing back an Australian 90’s classic children’s television series. This one is sure to make her aware of just how creative you can be with your penis.
     How to do: Send a video of you using your penis to paint a picture (even if it is a drawing of a dick) and mail this to your loved one. Be sure to get non-toxic paint.

Get sexting!

Lexi, xx